


Deaf Encounters

by welcometothenewhigh



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Deaf community, F/F, Friendship, Happy Ending, Love Confessions
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-06
Updated: 2016-04-21
Packaged: 2018-04-25 01:56:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 21,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4942213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/welcometothenewhigh/pseuds/welcometothenewhigh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The deaf story you never asked for. Lexa Woods has her world turned upside down from a sickness at the age of ten, leaving her deaf and alone to figure out her world.<br/>With little family support it's hard, but friends make everything easier.</p><p>Where Lexa meets Clarke, and Clarke is determined to prove to her their differences are purely statistical.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I'm sorry, Miss Woods

**Author's Note:**

> I figured why not. Clexa can beat anything.

8 Years Previously. . .

"Miss Woods, we've diagnosed Alexandria with bacterial meningitis. I know that is very scary to hear, but I assure you we have already given her the proper medication to aid her recovery." The doctor glanced subtly at the small child and looked back to her towering mother. "It appears our diagnosis is too late however, usually if the infection is caught in the first 48 hours it is reversible and any symptoms are easily treatable. With Alexandria though, she is showing signs of prolonged sickness and-" Alexandria's mother, Emori, snapped then. Spit flying off her snared lips.  
"What are you saying Dr. Jackson? What's happened to my daughter!" She demanded, now looking to her ten year old daughters big green eyes and seeing no recollection as she watched the two argue in front of her.  
"Miss Woods... Alexandria has suffered hearing loss. It is most likely irreparable damage, even as she heals she will probably not gain the sense back. It is common in children who are illed by meningitis-" Emori turned on her heel then, snatching her oblivious and stoic faced daughter's wrist, leading them out and not looking back. 

4 Years Later. . .

Emori had been drinking ever since Alexandria had been sick and gone deaf. It was as if her daughter had been meant to be deaf because as quiet as she'd been before, she embraced her new silence and even seemed physically silent too. Her daughter always had a guard up and didn't smile much. She never spoke, laughed or even hummed. Though she obviously spoke aloud fluently before at age ten. Emori assumed it was because she could not hear her own self and now couldn't tell if her words sounded right. She missed her daughters voice and going on 4 years of this new Alexandria, had resigned herself to the quiet air of the house and drank instead. Some nights she'd find herself so uncontrollably angry at her little girl for getting sick and becoming deaf. She had left Emori alone in this world, essentially checking out of reality even though her mom still needed her, still wanted her. Those are the nights she'd be in the kitchen breaking all the glassware they owned, screaming along to the shattering echoes. Alexandria upstairs unknowing. Then Emori would cry and drink as she cleaned up the pieces. One time Alexandria came down for a snack while Emori lain on the floor, holding glass to her neck and drinking out of a bottle. Her daughter spoke then, breaking through the wall of silence built in her mother's ears. "Momma, stop." She'd pleaded. She reached for the shard and the liquor bottle. That was the last night Emori smashed things out of anger and gave in to just drinking herself to sleep most nights. 


	2. Nothing like the present

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The restaurant begins to prepare for a big night for bankers and investors. Lexa gets a surprise when a certain blonde shows up with her rich mother.

_Another 4 Years Later_   
  


Lexa, as she now called herself, attended a rather prestigious and accommodating school- Grounder Prep For the Deaf. Ever since she'd gone to middle school with the hearing and dealt with all kinds of bullying, Lexa vowed to go only to a high school for people like her. That is how she and her mother found themselves in the small city of Aspen Hill, in Washington D.C. Lexa was very grateful her mother had stopped drinking for the last few months in order to bring in some money for the move and actually staying sober for the move itself. Now that they've been here for a few months, Emori had begun drinking again but Lexa didn't mind. _If that kept her happy,_ she thought.  
  
Lexa had already landed a job at this cool restaurant where everybody who worked there was deaf and the patrons were mostly hearing. At first she wasn't sure if it would go well, but after learning that the orders were all taken on a table tablet and all she'd do was serve them and smile; she accepted. She'd even made some friends, all of whom were deaf and knew A.S.L. Lexa had learned sign language shortly after becoming deaf, but to her dismay her mother never bothered. If she wanted to pretend there was no way to communicate with her daughter, so be it. Lexa did not need her, she never truly had. Lexa prided herself on being good at being alone, but sometimes it got to be too much. Those nights she would text Anya, her best friend from work and they would joke and laugh into the early hours of the morning. She was happy about her new life, she almost didn't remember being able to hear and she couldn't bring herself to even care.  
  
When Lexa headed into work for a morning meeting, she could feel the vibrations of the loud music which made her smile. Though they're all deaf there, the music is up so high and carelessly loud before the patrons come in to pump up the staff. She opened the door to the faculty room and was met with Anya, Echo, a few other workers, their boss Indra who was partial hearing and a big burly guy she'd come to know as Gustus. He was hearing as well, but only partially too and that's why he was the security for the restaurant. Sometimes people come in, not even paying attention to signs that say the workers are deaf (or the fact that the restaurant is named 'Deaf Encounters' ) and they create chaos. Yelling at the servers and waving their arms wildly, not understanding why they're essentially being ignored. That's when Gustus comes up and tries to soothe their actions, explaining that this restaurant is run by the hearing impaired. Only once so far in the few months she'd been working there had she seen a fight break out due to that.  
  
  


_5 Months Ago_

It was a pretty busy Friday night and Lexa was working with Anya and training a new girl, Monroe, when a big group of Sky Prep kids came in. The food served there was absolutely phenomenal, probably a reason that all kinds of people showed up to eat there. However this group of about 5 came right in and sat around a big booth, looking around at the other customers. They quickly grew restless when nobody approached their table to take their orders and one of the boys got up and came right up to Lexa. He began motioning and yelling how about they'd been there for at least fifteen minutes and nobody even walked their way, Lexa could read lips pretty well and that's how she knew he was so upset. She smiled shyly and began walking him back to the booth, pointing to a tablet that was perched on the end of their table. He seemed to get it then, but he kept on talking and flailing his arms at her.  
  
She read on his lips, "why aren't you talking to me? what's wrong with you?" Over and over. She gestured to her ears nonchalantly and smiled again, looking to the rest of his friends as they watched the scene unfold. The boy smirked at her when he realized she was deaf and started to laugh at her. "How can someone as hot as you be retarded? What the hell." She read. Lexa had furrowed her brow immediately, clenching her jaw as the boy kept getting closer and tried grabbing her. A girl got up then, ripping his arms down to his side and Lexa figured she was reprimanding him. Lexa quickly turned on her heel to get back to work. About twenty minutes later their food was prepared and Lexa brought it over to their table. She smiled at the group and gave a thumbs up, not looking to the sulky boy. One girl, the one who stopped her friend earlier, kept looking at her though. She was a gorgeous small blonde with bright blue eyes and Lexa found herself smiling back.  
  
After serving more tables and customers the rest of the night, their group seemed to get rowdier and rowdier, despite not even being able to hear them. The few boys at the table were throwing napkins around, tossing food at each other and laughing heartily, disrupting other patrons. One couple got up and went to Gustus, explaining the situation. Gustus walked over to the booth and Lexa watched as his back was turned to her, the group of kids (mainly the boys) started laughing at him and pointing. She assumed they made fun of the rest of them, because Gustus promptly grabbed hold of the one who'd insulted her before and dragged him to the door. That's when the other two boys, a giant with big muscles and tattoos and a skinny, smirking brunette chased after him jumping on his back. Within seconds the girls had run over to try and break up the fight, Lexa and other customers watching from the back completely appalled.  
  
Gustus threw out the jerk and the muscle head, but the brunette boy was fast and kept circling him. She watched the blonde grab hold of the boy and similar looking brunette girl do the same, but with his attention being fully on taking down Gustus, his swinging fists made contact with the blonde and she crumpled. Before Lexa knew what she was doing she'd hopped the counter and was stalking towards the fight. She grabbed the boy by his collar and proceeded to bring his face into her knee, spewing blood and throwing him out the door. She looked to the brunette girl with a death stare as she collected her fallen friend, soon they continued out too. Gustus has simply locked the door and motioned for the other customers to stay calm and it was over, please go back to eating and forget what happened. Lexa took Gustus' hand and brought him to the back. Since that night that group hadn't come back, but Lexa wanted to see the blonde again despite it all.  
  


_Present_

Lexa sat down next to Anya, watching Indra sign to them. "Tonight is a big one, we have important people from D.C coming to oversee our work. There will be many politicians and potential investors. Hopefully we can get Deaf Encounters to open a chain, giving more opportunities to other communities." She smiled happily, waving her hands for emphasis. Gustus stood up and clapped for her, Lexa and the rest joining. Tonight was definitely important if it meant a plausible new restaurant opening. Indra had been trying to open another deaf-help restaurant for years and even with Deaf Encounters going so well, sometimes it didn't seem like a good enough idea to get the investors and politic guys to actually come down. The meeting came to a close and Indra told them to all have a good school day and please arrive early again later. Lexa assured her the night would run smoothly and she was determined to make it so. She walked out of the restaurant with Anya on her heel as they made their way to Grounder Prep. 'Time to kick today's ass' Lexa signed and they laughed. 


	3. A night to remember

Clarke’s phone kept ringing, she knew it was either Raven or Octavia, but tonight she would be going to back to Deaf Encounters for the first time since the fight and she didn’t want anyone interrupting her.

  


_5 Months Earlier_

“Guys there’s an amazing restaurant literally five minutes from here. Let’s just walk there!” A drunken Octavia suggests to the group which consists of her brother Bellamy, her boyfriend Lincoln, Clarke and her boyfriend Finn. Clarke jumped up and down excitedly, taking Finn’s hand and pulling him towards the restaurant.  
  
“Let’s go!!” Clarke shouted happily, urging the rest of the group to follow suit. They all walked and pranced down the sidewalk in their oblivious states, arriving at the restaurant and waltzing in. None of them reading the many signs on the walls that say ‘deaf personnel’ or paying attention to the name of the place either. Clarke looked around, taking in the joint before they took up residence in a corner booth. It was pretty brightly lit in there, despite the deep maroon walls and black booths, contrasting the black and white checkered floor. The five of them situated themselves comfortably, Octavia and Clarke squished in the center, Lincoln and Bell on Octavia’s left and Finn on Clarke’s right.  
  
“So Octavia, let’s hear all about you and Lincoln huh?” Clarke smiled deviously, prodding for information on the new couple. Lincoln and O were- safe to say- obsessed with each other and only recently started dating. O had seen Lincoln being hit on by some girls at Sky Prep and pretty much lost her shit when they were groping his muscles. Lincoln being the gentle giant he is simply picked up Octavia and began walking away while laughing, telling her he’d been waiting for her to do something and him and his friends set that situation up.  
  
“No! Fuck no! Let’s not and say we did hear all about them.” Bellamy grumbled, eyeing his little sister and his best friend. Even he knew it was only a matter of time before they were together, but that didn’t mean he had to be happy about it. Octavia laughed at her brother, ignoring him and launching right into the story of how Lincoln set her up to get jealous. Time passed rather quickly for the group, hardly realizing nobody had come to check on them yet when Finn spoke up.  
  
“Is it just me or have we been here way too long without service?” He barked, growing antsy and looking around for a server. He spotted a brunette who’d been walking around tables nearby without even glancing at them. He zeroed in, not waiting for his friends to answer him. “Hey chick, me and my friends have been waiting for a wicked long time. Why has nobody come to serve us?” He asked expectantly, gesturing to his table and his friends who were watching. The girl smiled shyly in return, watching his gestures before walking past him back to the booth. Finn got a good look and realized she was hot as hell, dark brown braided hair pulled up, bright green eyes and tanned skin. He smirked and sauntered back to his table, putting on a show for the waitress. He flipped his hair as he came up next to her, smirking at Clarke quickly too so she understood his game. When the brunette simply pointed to a small tablet that was perched on the table, he grew restless with her silence.  
  
“Okay, my bad, but why aren’t you talking to me? Is something wrong with you?” He asked impatiently, stepping closer to the girl. She backed up a step before smiling calmly again and pointing to her ears. _OH she’s deaf,_ Finn thought, _what a shame._ “How can someone as hot as you be retarded?” He tried reaching for her arm then just as Clarke jumped up, ripping his arms down to his side and reprimanding him.  
  
“Finn what the fuck, sit down! If she’s deaf that doesn’t mean she has problems, oh my god.” Clarke huffed angrily, embarrassed by him and practically sobering up on the spot. Apparently Finn didn’t see a problem with his actions because he laughed again and just leaned in to kiss Clarke hard. She pushed him off her quickly, looking to the retreating brunette. She is so beautiful, Clarke thought. After that mishap took place, they all typed their orders into the tablet and the group went back to their jokes, pestering each other about dumb things. Clarke stayed shaken at her boyfriend’s behavior, hardly paying attention to her friends.  
  
A little later the girl returned carrying their food and setting it down on the table. Clarke couldn’t help but smile widely at her, reaching for her own food trying to let their fingers brush. She smiled shyly at Clarke when they did graze each other, letting her eyes do most of the talking. Clarke thrived off that touch the rest of the night, hardly aware of the conversation around her until a big man came up to the table.  
“Hey kids, was just hoping you could be a little quieter, some of our patrons—” A drunk Finn cut him off then, to Clarke’s horror.  
  
“The fuck do you mean be quieter? The people here are deaf man! Even the hot chick you got working here.” He snarled, pointing to the pretty brunette washing down a table ways away. Finn then stood and tried shoving the man away. Clarke watched as he huffed, effortlessly taking Finn by the elbow and pulling him towards the exit immediately. Before Finn could even begin thrashing, Bell and Lincoln joined in. They crossed the floor quickly, Lincoln jumping onto his back and Bellamy beginning to throw drunken punches. Octavia and Clarke watched it as if it was slow motion, it all happening so quickly. Then Finn was being thrown out the door, followed by a clumsy Lincoln. Bell was faster though and was circling the man, landing punches in his torso. The girls decided to step in then and ran to the fight, Octavia on Bellamy’s back and Clarke stepping in front of him.  
  
“Bell cut it out! Now!” Octavia shouted from her perch, trying to overpower her brother. Just as Clarke reached for him, he turned quickly trying to get to the man and had an uppercut ready before Clarke stood in the way. She took the blow and crumpled to the floor, holding her now spinning head. Before she knew it she was being dragged out by Octavia now, Bellamy landing on the concrete in front of them with a bloody nose as the big bouncer yelled, “And stay out!” Locking the door behind them.  
  
In seconds Octavia was screaming at a bleeding Bellamy for hitting Clarke, then turning her anger onto the other two who stood sheepishly and swaying. Clarke’s head still dazed, she couldn’t make out their words but then each of her friends were taking turns inspecting her bleeding lip. They all crowded her and she finally snapped when Finn came into view, trying to kiss it better. “Are you kidding me?” She spit. “After everything you just pulled and starting a fight with a bouncer! Get away from me Finn.” She yelled loudly, disgust filling her voice. She scoffed at her boyfriend and began walking away, still holding her aching head. Finn began after her but Bellamy held him back as he yelled.  
  
“What the hell Clarke? You better chill out, you can’t yell at me like that.” He squawked drunkenly in anger, ignoring Bellamy holding him back.  
  
“Yes I can Finn! We are through!” She shouted back, turning around facing the divided group. Lincoln and Octavia watching awkwardly from the side, Bellamy in between the now broken up couple. “O? Lincoln? Will you walk home with me?” She watched her friends glanced between them all, before they nodded and caught up with Clarke as she turned and began home. _What a shit night,_

 

_Present_

“What?!” Clarke answered her phone hastily, still trying to pick out an outfit to wear.  
  
“Whoa simmer down Clarke. I realize you’re going to be seeing hot chick again tonight but if you’re in a mood she won’t be very happy.” Octavia sing-songed back.  
  
“I’m fine I’m fine, really. I’m just—so nervous I feel sick, you know? It’s not every day I meet someone who inspires me to dump my boyfriend and learn sign language!” Clarke spit out nervously. “O, I really need help choosing an outfit too. It’s a super important and fancy dinner for my mom.” Clarke grumbled. Octavia laughed on the other end, waiting for her friend to stop rambling.  
  
“Ok, you done? Listen. First of all you’ve been there before and you know even if it’s a fancy occasion, it’s a casual place. Second, take a deep freakin’ breath princess and send me some outfit pics. Deal? You’ll look hot no matter what.” She replied, trying to help her friend relax. Clarke sighed in response, taking a deep breath and agreeing.  
  
“Yeah okay I’ll send you some soon. I’ll text you later, O.” Clarke clicked the end call button and returned to her closet. So far she had three outfits laid out. One fancy- with a medium length little black dress with a simple sapphire necklace on top, matching black pumps. A casual choice- fitting black skinny jeans, a lacey cream colored long sleeve blouse and black cut off boots with a heel. Her last outfit and her favorite was a short, blood red dress and the same cut off boots. She knew that would look best, but being the daughter of top notch governor, Abigail Griffin, she didn’t want to make a statement. She put on each, taking flattering pictures and sending them to O. She sat on her bed, anxiously awaiting a response when her mom came in.  
  
“Hi sweetheart, are you almost ready? You know how much this dinner means to me. I’ve been waiting for a chance to go to this place and see what it’s all about. I really need to make sure Senator Kane see’s it for what it is, an opportunity!” Her mother chimed, sounding like she was giving a small speech. Clarke smiled at her mom and laid back on her bed before answering.  
  
“I’m almost ready but I need O to tell me which outfit to wear. I want to make a good impression.” Clarke admittedly sheepishly. She saw her mom quirk her eyebrow immediately so Clarke continued. “You know, on your behalf of course.” She bit her lip, hoping her mom bought it. Unfortunately Abby knew exactly why her daughter wanted to make an impression. She leaned over the bed, plucking the red dress up and tossing it over Clarke.  
  
“You know you want to wear that, so wear it honey.” She laughed at her daughter’s horrified and surprised face. “You’re 18 Clarke and you’re not the governor here. It’s your choice.” Clarke smiled happily and stood up to hug her mom. She loves how understanding Abby is of everything.  
  
“Yess! This will be great.” Clarke smiled, pushing her mom from the room so she could change.  
  
As Clarke finished up changing, she checked her mirror once more as her phone rang. She answered excitedly. “I’m going with the red!” She cheered. Octavia laughed and she could almost hear her shaking her head.  
  
“I would hope so! That was easily the best choice! So you’re leaving now then? Ok don’t forget to act cool, and I don’t mean cool as in you’re too cool to be hanging out with your mom in a deaf restaurant—” She paused, earning a loud laugh from Clarke. “I mean cool as in smile and wave, keep yourself from rambling like an idiot about how you’ve done nothing but obsess over this girl for almost six months.” Clarke blushed furiously at that. She had not been obsessing, this girl just happened to be all she could think about and she tended to draw her all the time instead of landscapes anymore. Ok…so she was a little obsessed, but she was determined to keep it cool.  
  
“Trust me, I know. If I go back tonight and she isn’t there though I will cry. O, what if she remembers me from the fight that night and she hates me? You remember how Finn treated her, like she wasn’t even a person just because she was deaf!” Clarke huffed, getting nervous again despite her outward confidence. She heard Octavia sigh.  
  
“Clarke there’s a great chance she’ll remember, but she can’t hold it against you. We were drunk and you were the one who stopped him from grabbing her. She’s got to appreciate that even if she’s not interested—” Clarke cut her off then.  
  
“Shit. What if she isn’t interested in me?! This whole time I’ve been assuming I could win her over. O, I know sign language because of her!” Clarke was exasperated now, breathing heavily and pacing her room.  
  
“I know you do, I mean hell you made me learn it with you! How could she not be interested though? You’re gorgeous and she’d be blind to not see that. Fuck, bad choice of words, but you know what I mean.” She paused, waiting for Clarke to answer but she could hear her friend still sighing at herself. “Clarke? Breathe, babe. You’re going to a dinner for your mom, she just happens to work there. It. Will. Be. Ok.” She enunciated slowly, hoping to once again relax Clarke.  
  
“You’re right O, you’re right. I’m going to go there and it will be a-ok. Right?” She asked, more towards herself. “Okay yeah, I’ll text you later then. Bye O.” Clarke hung up quickly, grabbing her black shawl and hanging it over her shoulders before heading downstairs to meet her mom.  
  
Abigail and Clarke pulled up to the restaurant about a half an hour later, a little earlier than the dinner called for but as governor her mom had an important role to play. Clarke followed her mom into the restaurant, there was obscenely loud music blaring as they entered and they each reached to cover their ears immediately. Clarke looked up in her panic to see her oh-so-pretty brunette with wide eyes as she ran quickly to shut off the music. Once it was off, which she figured out because suddenly her ribcage wasn’t vibrating anymore, she spotted the girl again.  
  
She was walking towards them with the bouncer from last time. Clarke bit her lip taking in the girl’s appearance. She hadn’t seen her in five months but she looked just as beautiful, if not more. The brunette wore a very smoothed out, white button up with the sleeves pulled to her forearms, black slim fit trousers and her hair was hanging wonderfully, braids and all. Clarke almost fainted at the sight. She had no idea she could be so attracted to someone’s forearms, but seeing this girl getting closer Clarke was swooning.  
  
“Hello Governor Griffin! I am so sorry about that music—the workers like it loud if you know what I mean. We are so honored you could join us tonight for this special evening.” The man, Gustus she read, boomed to them. He had a gentle smile and kind eyes as he reached for her mother’s hand.  
  
“Oh Gustus call me Abby, please. I’m so happy I could come. You know how much I want to help out this community and open a new restaurant somewhere else in D.C!” Her mom gushed, pulling the big man into a hug. “This is my daughter, Clarke. She’s a big fan of this place I heard and she even has been learning sign language the past few months.” Clarke beat red, looking to her feet quickly before looking up to him.  
  
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Gustus.” She said sweetly, earning a small grin from the beautiful brunette at his side.  
  
“Oh you too Clarke, you too. I’ve heard much about you from your mother.” He smiled to her, then turned to his companion. “This is Lexa, she’s been here for a few months and is new to D.C.” He signed his words as he spoke. Clarke looked to meet the girl’s mesmerizing green eyes. Clarke saw he was telling her that she could sign too and Lexa smiled big. Clarke’s heart skipped a beat.  
  
‘Nice to meet you, Clarke.’ Lexa signed in response and Clarke couldn’t help but blush, earning another grin from the girl.  
  
‘It’s nice to meet you too, Lexa. When did you move here?’ Clarke asked, making sure her movements were fluid and she kept eye contact. The girl smiled.  
  
‘6 months ago. I am not as new as Gustus makes me out to be.’ She signed and laughed quietly, looking to Gustus who was observing the two. Clarke’s heart skipped another beat when she heard the breathy laugh of Lexa. Suddenly Clarke lost all interest in this dinner and wanted nothing more to than to sit and talk with Lexa all night. Just when Clarke began to sign back, Abigail interrupted, clearly unaware of the special moment.  
  
“Clarke sweetheart, let’s take our seat and let them get to work while we wait for the others.” Clarke frowned immediately, but listened anyway. She signed quickly to Lexa.  
  
‘I hope we can talk more. It was nice to meet you.’ She smiled big and followed her mom to a booth. She didn’t see Lexa’s wide smile.  
  
***  
  
Lexa knew tonight was important to Indra and Gustus, if they did well in presenting the restaurant there was a huge chance another one would be opening within the year. Governor Griffin and Senator Kane were the most important to impress, so when the Governor came in early and proceeded to cover her ears from the bellowing music- she ran to turn it off. She went to Gustus quickly explaining it, horrified at herself for having been playing her favorite song (Girls Don’t Like Boys- Good Charlotte) so loudly. Gustus had laughed it off, taking her arm and leading her out to meet the Governor. As they rounded the corner, Lexa got a better glimpse at the blonde who had come in with her. It was _her._ The girl from that fight night with the jerk boyfriend. Lexa swallowed as they approached. The blonde staring at her intently, Lexa couldn’t help but smile shyly. She watched as Gustus apologized for the music, then welcomed the Governor and her daughter, whose name is Clarke. Lexa couldn’t help but bite her lip to keep from smiling as he introduced Clarke to her.  
  
Apparently Clarke had begun learning sign language, which made Lexa happy. Really happy. She couldn’t help but be disappointed after their little conversation was over, due to the girl’s mom interrupting and pulling Clarke away. The blonde said she wanted to talk more though, so Lexa made sure to take their orders when they came in. After about fifteen minutes of friendly talk, Indra came out and introduced herself and told her how excited she was to have them there.  
  
Once 8:00 p.m. came, the door opened and suits of all kinds came through. Senator Kane with his slicked black hair and even slicker Armani coat. When he smiled though his kind eyes took away from his egotistical look. He was followed by more suits, probably a body guard or two and many bankers with their glasses perched on their faces. Lexa ended up taking the table that sat Governor Griffin, Senator Kane, another Senator, a state representative by the name of Thelonious Jaha, his son Wells and of course, Clarke in all her red-dress glory. When it came to bring out their food, Lexa put on her best smile as she approached. She tried reading their lips as she got closer and picked up on, “I’m impressed already Abby, really.” Then something like “This place is very orderly and well kept.” From Jaha. They smiled at her when she came over, placing their orders in front of each. (The good thing about the tablet is each person puts in their seat placement when they order, so there are no embarrassing mishaps.)  
  
The Senator looked at Lexa as she placed his fish and chips meal, with curly fries instead of steak (apparently those are his favorite) and she dared speak as they all beamed at her. “Please enjoy.” She said sheepishly, smiling still. She watched all their eyes bulge quickly and she grinned, Clarke’s jaw dropped slightly as the blonde blushed. As she turned around, she smirked proudly at her courage to talk. She hadn’t spoken aloud to strangers in many years, usually just humming or laughing quietly but something about Clarke made Lexa want to change. In a good way and Lexa was grateful for that.  
  
After a few hours rolled around and they had been serving alcohol, all the suits seemed to have loosened up, placing their fancy coats on booths and laughing loudly with each other. Lexa, Anya and a couple others stood in the back happily observing the crowd. She could see Indra beaming with pride as she received compliment after compliment about the establishment she created from the ground up. When 10:30 p.m. came and they were half an hour from closing, most of the suits had cleared out after reassuring Indra of their investment confirmations. The only table left was the Governors, and as Lexa came by for the last time to make sure they were all set, Clarke stood and pulled her to the side. Lexa held her breath nervously.  
  
‘Lexa, this was wonderful. This place is great.’ She signed excitedly, skipping over an article or two but Lexa smiled at her anyway.  
  
‘Thank you, Clarke. I hope you all enjoyed yourselves tonight.’ Lexa responded, doing slower movements just in case. That earned a blush from the blonde.  
  
‘We did. I did especially.’ Clarke blushed harder, looking at Lexa. She continued, ‘I made this for you. I hope you like it.’ She signed, handing Lexa a napkin with a drawn face. Lexa looked closer and realized it was her. She beat red as she observed the detail, from her intricate braids to her little smile and expressive eyes.  
  
‘Wow, Clarke. This is…’ She paused, looking for the right phrase. ‘Well done and very nice of you.’ She decided on, Clarke looked slightly confused at the ‘nice’ sign, perhaps she hadn’t learned informal A.S.L just yet. Lexa bit her lip, thinking. She took a pen from her pocket and wrote on the napkin, “very nice” making Clarke laugh. She saw her shoulders bounce gently and she laughed lightly in return. Lexa continued to look at the drawing, dumbfounded as to why this beautiful girl drew her and is still speaking to her. _Did she not have that boyfriend waiting for her goodnight text somewhere?_ She thought. Clarke saw her furrowed brow and reached for the napkin once more. She took Lexa’s pen from her hand, resting her hand gently on hers for a second earning a blush. Lexa watched patiently as she scribbled something then pressed the napkin into her hand again, poking the pen back into her breast pocket. Lexa’s eyes widened and the blonde smirked.  
  
‘I hope to hear from you soon. Goodnight Lexa.’ Clarke signed, then leaned in and kissed her cheek slowly. Lexa was burning bright red when she pulled away but the blonde pretended to not notice. Waving cutely and following the rest of the group out the door. She glanced one more time at Lexa, who still stood incredulously in the same spot holding her cheek. Lexa managed a smile and signed goodnight. She looked at her drawing one more time and barely suppressed a squeal when she saw ‘Text me (; XXX-XXXX –Clarke Griffin’ Lexa smiled again and ran to turn on the music, twirling with the vibrations in pure happiness.


	4. It Never Ends

Two whole days later and her phone still did not buzz with a message. Had she read the situation completely wrong? It’s not like Lexa came out and said she wanted to talk with her too. Clarke had told the girl she wanted to know her and it seemed like she did too. Now she wasn’t so sure though, because Clarke has been in school the past two days and walking by the restaurant after without so much as a sighting of the brunette. _Maybe I scared her away,_ she thought with a sinking feeling.

Clarke breezed through the morning of the third day, trying hard to push aside any negative thoughts. It was Saturday. Surely she would be working today and Clarke could catch her. She didn’t feel especially creepy or anything just yet, mainly because her hopes were set so high for this to all work out. Also she really didn’t know Lexa too well, so no permanent damage could come from this not furthering more. (Right?) For the blonde, she felt like she’d been waiting her entire life to meet Lexa. Like every day she lived was just her getting by, but since seeing her for the first time almost 6 months ago she’d felt a renewed sense to wake every day and see what life had in store for her. 

Today Clarke put on denim jeans, a loose white V-neck and her favorite black vans all followed by a backwards snap back. This was her confident outfit, comfortable yet cute and she knew it. She hoped to see Lexa once she got downtown. Lately she’d been looking for the brunette everywhere she went. Unsurprisingly though they did not frequent the same places. When Clarke was feeling bored or lonely she would call up her wild friends and meet them for food somewhere whereas Lexa when feeling bored, would go for long walks in the woods following trails and blurs of animals through the brush. Still Clarke felt compelled to her, she wanted and needed to have more of the brunette in her life.

Walking down Ark Street, the main road was bustling with people walking around in tourist uniforms. D.C was always full of strangers, that’s what Clarke liked so much about living in the city, even a small one. There were always new people to meet and adventures to have. Even when her mind was running through a million things, the one constant was Lexa. Clarke maneuvered her way through a crowd of people taking pictures of the sky and the buildings while laughing. She smirked at their inability to care for the regulars as they took in the old brick buildings with marble plaques and stood for selfies with each other.

As Clarke looked away from the tourist scene, she found herself walking towards Polis Park, sketchbook in hand to the pride of Aspen Hill. She used to come almost every day when she was younger, but after losing her dad she lost her sense of appreciation for the simplicity too. She walked through the main arch which overlooks a perfect sized pond, surrounded by hundreds of swaying colors of flowers in the wind. _It's still beautiful_ she thought as she breathed deeply the scent of nature. Clarke made her way along the rock wall that lead closer to the lake, looking at the little fish swimming inside, the frogs croaking on their lily pads and the many ducklings following their mothers. She passed a pair of boys she recognized from Sky Prep, trying and mostly succeeding in ignoring their trailing eyes and the way they slowed their conversation as she passed. 

“Where you goin Griffin? You should hang out with us,” One boy smirked. She recognized him as John Murphy, a troublemaker and his friend with an equally uncomfortable gaze, Nyko. Finn’s boys. Great she thought. She hardly glanced up as she waved them off, quickening her pace. Murphy called after her once more as she left the scene but she paid no mind. Seeing a bench across the way she followed the trail around the pond until she was then sitting in it’s deep curve, staring into the water. She opened her book to start drawing what she saw in front of her. She hoped her phone might ding soon.  
  
***  
  
Lexa didn’t know how long she should wait. Considering the blonde hardly gave her any choice in speaking again since she said she couldn’t wait to hear from her soon. Of course Lexa wanted to text Clarke and maybe get to know her better but what if she meant just like, you know, ‘text me if you need anything’ like a casual pass off. She furrowed her brow at this, officially stumped. It was Saturday and she had work tonight but for now it was before noon and she had a few hours. Like any time she’s trying to figure things out, she leaves her house and heads to the park nearby. 

She strides through the entrance, taking in the light blue sky and feathery clouds above her. It was May, so the warmth of spring was in the air as well the light smell of blooming flowers. Lexa was amazed every time by the way even her silence felt normal when she was here. It was so serene, the pond hardly rippled in the wind. The flowers surrounding it were just as calm, swaying breezily. Lexa put in some headphones because she liked to be left alone and usually nobody harassed her if she had wires hanging from her ears and a blank expression. In truth the end of the cord just curled in her pocket. She made her own music. 

As she walked under the trees, just beginning to grow new leaves and branches she saw her favorite bench up ahead. It had someone sitting in it though, usually nobody really sits around to look at the surrounding beauty like she does, unless you’re smoking like the boys she could see across the water- billows in the air. She held her breath as she got closer, seeing a girl with a backwards hat and her knees pulled to her chest, just staring out. Lexa came around the side of a tree still slightly hidden by the treeline and observed the profile of this stranger. Her breath caught in her throat as she recognized a familiar strong jaw. She backed into the tree she was now fully hidden by and breathed probably a little too heavily but hey, she couldn’t tell.  
  
There was a long silence, an even quieter silence as she waited for any courage to surface but suddenly the blonde-- Clarke, peeked around the corner and her jaw fell open as she most likely gasped. “I knew I would see you again!” Lexa mostly missed what she said, but made out ‘see you again’ and gave a small smile. Clarke looked horrified at herself, but scrambled to sign what she said. Lexa let out a puffy laugh as she looked at the big blue eyes watching her.

Lexa signed in return, stepping closer to the girl. ‘It is nice to see you, Clarke.’ The blonde smiled at seeing her name sign used. Lexa wanted to say her name so badly but instead she watched as the blonde stared unabashedly at her. Lexa was wearing faded light jean shorts, distressed combat boots and an abstract, ‘Obey the Drop’ skrillex shirt that was galaxy colored. She had headphones in too which Clarke smiled widely at as she tugged at one and put it to her ear. She only smiled more then and Lexa simply bit her lip waiting to see how she’d react to the public deceit. 

The blonde signed ‘Really?’ grinning. Lexa shrugged and gave a hesitant smile in return. She walked to the bench now that she’d been found out. She was surprised to see a sketchbook sitting out, open to a rough but good drawing of the lake and all its flowers, the arch and the bridge off to the left. Lexa gasped as she glanced to Clarke, who was already watching her with quiet fondness in her eyes. The brunette blushed slightly, as she pointed to the book.  
  
‘Wow, Clarke. You not only have talent for napkin portraits but this too. You are great.’ She watched the smaller girl beat red immediately as Lexa finished her sentence and she looked down. Lexa made a point to laugh louder than her usual breathy one and she saw Clarke’s head whip up in a huge smile and found herself smiling too.  
  
***   
  
Clarke looked down at the ground quickly, trying to hide her blushing face from Lexa. This girl managed to make her such a jumble of nerves she didn’t know how to act normal, she found herself over thinking every movement of the brunette. As she tried thinking of something to say she heard Lexa laugh for real and it actually made Clarke’s heart stop and her stomach start bursting with butterflies. She didn’t want to miss the accompanying smile so she looked up to see the most beautiful thing she’d ever witnessed. The swirl of gold dancing around in the forests of her eyes, the creases of her smile with her high cheekbones and the fullness of her lips in all their pink essence on her tan skin. She tried to memorize her face forever.  
  


‘You are beautiful Lexa.’ She found herself signing as she moved in to close the distance on the bench. Lexa made no move to slide further but she looked away quickly to the water and Clarke saw her jaw clench. Though she didn’t know what to do next but she didn't want to take it back she managed to to continue. She waved her hand near Lexa as she spoke and motioned as well. ‘I just wanted to say that so you know it. So you know I think it.’ She waited, watching Lexa glance all over her face as if searching for something. Then a blush managed to finally make it’s way to her ears and the corners of her lips turned up. Clarke’s heart was beating in her chest way too fast and she needed Lexa to do something, anything. 

‘You are even more beautiful.’ The brunette finally then motioned as she bit her lip and looked away again, making Clarke go silent as she replayed the expressions she’d just seen. She felt her jaw drop at Lexa's complimenting her and knew her face was red again. Still she pulled Lexa’s hand into hers without thinking and kissed it gently, trying to look into the girl’s green eyes but she was staring at Clarke’s lips on her hand. Clarke squeezed it and let their entwined fingers drop between their laps. She knew she was being unfair taking up half of Lexa’s way to say something but she hoped the girl would just go with it. Clarke was too caught up in the moment to notice how nervous she was making her.

Finally Lexa looked into her eyes as she lightly rubbed her thumb along Clarke’s hand, breathing deeply and looking unsure what the blonde wanted from her. _Nothing, other than your heart_ she thought. Then Lexa seemed to decide to just go with the moment as she pulled the blonde’s hand into her lap and looked off to the water. Clarke was more than happy to sit there and look at the water too. She gave Lexa’s hand a squeeze once in awhile to remind her she was there, as Lexa seemed to be completely zoned out. Clarke was contemplating what to do next when she remembered she could take Lexa out somewhere. It was so easy to get lost with Lexa in her quiet world that she forgot there were normal things they could be doing together too. She jumped excitedly in her place, pulling Lexa into the moment again. She smiled at the blonde expectantly.  
‘Come with me somewhere?’ She signed hopefully and Lexa looked around quickly before she grinned and nodded. Clarke took her hand back again, hoping Lexa wouldn’t mind and she began their journey to her favorite spot.  
  
***  
  
Lexa could hardly breathe with her hand fitting securely in Clarke’s. Her nerves were an imploding mess inside her but her face remained passive, suggesting she was simply content. She hoped Clarke couldn’t hear the hum of her pounding heart or feel the way her hands felt slick in their grasp. Lexa was begging herself to stay calm when all she wanted to do was stare at the gorgeous view next to her and revel in the warmth of her closeness. Her and Clarke had been walking for ten minutes or so, hand in hand and every time people would begin to appear Lexa tried to pull her hand away to save Clarke any shame but each time the grip tightened. She couldn’t fight her if she wanted.

Eventually they stopped outside an old looking brick house, which Clarke lead her through the sidegate of into a deep green, flower filled pathway. The blonde walked ahead of her, holding their hands together as they dangled behind her back. She seemed to frolic in the depths of the thigh reaching grass and Lexa couldn’t help but have a skip in her step too. Clarke turned on her heel as they entered the end of the path and into a clearing in the backyard. It was like a little nook in a fairy haven and Lexa loved it. Clarke took a seat in a plushy wicker chair and Lexa sat in another, taking in the comfy feeling of the circle. 

‘This is my little spot. I like to come out here and just be.’ Clarke signed, she resigned to laying her head back and looking to the sky, apparently not expecting Lexa to reply. So she nodded and looked to the sky too, her hands in her lap. Clarke then reached over taking Lexa’s left hand in her own and just smiled, looking back up. Lexa couldn’t help but squeeze her fingers in response. Being near the blonde made everything feel so right.  
  
After they hung out in those chairs under the pale sky without words for an unknown amount of time, Lexa finally remembered she had work at four and glanced to her phone abruptly. Clarke startled and whipped her head looking to the frantic brunette, Lexa stood immediately upon seeing 3:48 p.m. on her phone. _How could almost three hours go by so fast?_ She felt like they’d just sat down but as she released Clarke’s hand she plainly felt the absence of her warmth and knew they’d been there for much longer. Clarke’s eyes were widened but she must have figured Lexa was leaving. She took the brunettes hand again and held it tight as she tried to calm Lexa who was now signing wildly that she had to go and was late, etc etc. Clarke smirked innocently at her ‘rambling.’

‘Lexa don’t worry. You have to work?’ She signs. Lexa was nodding hard and Clarke couldn’t help but laugh. She motioned for Lexa to wait there and she ran into her house to grab something. They weren’t far but if Clarke wanted to drive her she couldn’t argue even to save her pride. The blonde came back out after a minute and found Lexa who was pacing in her spot, twirling her fingers through her hair. She looked up at seeing Clarke’s bright hair in her peripheral and she bit her lip as the girl approached. Clarke seemed to be amused, much to her dismay. ‘Come on.’ She gestured, leading them to her garage where they got into a wine colored Audi. 

Within minutes (3:55 p.m.) the two were pulled up in front of the restaurant, the first place they met. Lexa had jitters as she wasn’t sure what came next, like in the park she felt like there was something to be done or said with the two of them just looking at the other. Lexa cleared her throat before motioning. ‘Thank you for the ride, Clarke. Today was a good day.’ She blushed helplessly and the blonde seemed to laugh and reached for Lexa’s hand. She grazed her lips on her knuckles and Lexa felt her breath catch for the millionth time today. 

‘Every day seems to be a good day if you’re there.’ The blonde signed releasing her hand and pointing to the clock then, not wanting to give them time to make anything awkward. Lexa smiled gratefully at Clarke for excusing her from replying, her blush still apparent. She leaned in and kissed Clarke’s cheek lightly and without looking back she got out of the car and entered the doors. Finally releasing a well held breath she ignored Indra’s questioning face and made for the back room. Lexa still felt her head whirling and her breaths were probably too loud as she regained her composure. _Clarke is actually amazing, I can’t screw this up_ she thought purposefully.

After what felt like hours of rushing around tables and delivering food with smiles, Lexa felt exhausted. With her mind on a certain blonde and her body in a hurry, she was hardly really there for the shift she was sharing with Monroe and Anya. Since the investment dinner went so well the previous week Indra had kept the evening hours at 11:00 p.m. close and though Lexa appreciated extra hours and all the money she could save, she still felt depleted. She was used to being active for hours on end but she was not used to this new emotional toll she had over her thoughts on Clarke. She was feeling hopeful, apprehensive, excited, nervous, terrified, electric. She couldn’t decide what she felt towards this new chapter in her life. Lexa focused on work, pushing aside all random thoughts and found herself wiping down the last table in no time. 

Once the final customers of the night were out the door the brunette turned on the speakers as she, Anya and the smaller brunette Monroe began jumping to the heavy, rib cage shaking bass. Anya motioned to Lexa, ‘How was Clarke today? We saw you in the car Lexa!’ Anya chastised her, making the three laugh. She responded quickly, with a blush spreading through her cheeks.  
  
‘Oh my god guys! It was nothing.’ Her face burned, ‘I found her at the park. We spoke and hung out and then it was work time.’ Anya’s brow furrowed, but Lexa turned away smiling. She skipped the part where her and Clarke held hands almost the whole three hours they were in each other's presence and how they kept stealing what they thought were surreptitious glances. How the two found themselves not even talking but still happy. She could save those details for herself, until she was sure Clarke would be sticking around. Her heart hummed.

‘Whatever you say Commander.’ Monroe signed in answer, surprising Lexa by using the nickname Indra gave her. She smirked and made sure the others were seeing her when she replied.  
  
‘Neither of you are to call me that! Ever!’ She extended her gestures for emphasis and they all laughed. Finally they closed up, Lexa locking the doors as they left. She was beat. For a whole day her mind was running, her body going the opposite way and now she had to go home to face her careless mother. Her blood thickened at the thought. For a few years now, once she was 16 and had been driving and going to school regularly, their relationship had seemingly diminished. Ever since she felt her mother pulling away so much she of course took on the blame, making herself believe if she wasn’t deaf they would be okay. She couldn’t do anything about that though, not yet at least. She was saving for something to surprise her mother one day but she wasn’t ready just yet.  
  
The girls had departed on their ways home, Lexa deciding to walk because the nights were warm again. She made it to her street and saw her house, the only house with a porch light on at quarter of midnight.. That was a good sign at least, her mom remembered to keep it on for her. The thought made Lexa’s heart soar and lurch at the same time, an eerie yet familiar feeling in her chest. Climbing the stone steps of the porch she saw a shadow inside her house, indicating her mom was still up.  
  
The shadow began moving towards the door as Lexa walked in, closing it softly with a lock as her mom came into view. She saw her lips spitting words and her throat vein pulsed, she was very drunk Lexa could smell. It made her feel small and helpless as she watched her mom yell at her, she could not hear the sounds but saw her mouth curve around some words like, ‘fucking late’ ‘trouble’ ‘how could you’ and then when her mom came closer she just closed her eyes for what came next.  
  
A violent smack met the side of her head and then her face met the wall. It happened so fast Lexa was left reeling as she held her head in her hands. Another fist came down, tangling itself in her hair as she was ripped from the ground. Lexa was most likely panting in fear now but all she heard ringing silence as her mom shoved her into the wooden stairs. Lexa scrambled to her feet and hands, climbing the stairs like a scared cat, ignoring the blood trail on her brow. Her mother didn’t follow, like she never did and Lexa made it to her room to cry. A light on hadn’t turned out to mean her mom remembered it for her, it was just another symbol of another drunk night in her life. She shook with fear and threw herself in bed, the cut on her face glowering painfully but her adrenaline and fear held her in place. She fell asleep unknowing of the way her mom screamed at herself downstairs.


	5. Sunday morning rain is falling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I basically played maroon 5 during my whole writing of this so that explains the title. enjoy maybe.

Clarke was awake early that Sunday, not that she wanted to be but because in her dream she tried picturing Lexa and had to wake up suddenly. She looked to her phone and saw nothing, no messages and she still didn’t have Lexa’s number so she couldn’t see what she was doing or how she slept, even though Clarke really wanted to ask. Even the day before she was too caught up in Lexa’s attention to ask why she never did text her. She assumed maybe texting wasn’t her thing, even though clearly talking on the phone wasn’t either. Clarke just wanted to be talking to her somehow and she found herself missing the brunette.  
  
She ended up stopping her pity parade and told herself Lexa was tired from work the night before. Content with that Clarke began her sunday ritual, an intense long run on the treadmill followed by a stack of pancakes. Her dad Jake always made the best pancakes, after he passed away Clarke always ate them on sundays like they used to in the morning. She loved her dad and missed him every day, especially since her mom Abby wasn’t exactly around for pancake parties being that she was a governor and all. Clarke sighed as she started her run. She paid no attention to the blinking on her phone.  
  
After about 55 straight minutes of running Clarke finally slowed her pace and walked for a bit longer, letting her heart rate settle. She was sweating and panting but she felt much lighter and felt her lungs expanding gratefully. Clarke always found herself feeling happy after a good workout. She jumped into the shower once she’d caught her breath and a little bit later she emerged, smelling of honey and cinnamon. She plopped down onto her bed with a sigh, not sure what to do with her day. She wanted to see Lexa again, but knew that probably wouldn’t happen as she seemed to be pretty reserved. Clarke respected that though and understood obviously.  
  
Clarke finally picked up her phone after her morning routine took place and she lost her breath at seeing an unknown numbers’ message.  
  
**Unknown 6:23 a.m. Good morning Clarke. I realize you are sleeping and I am so sorry if you don’t want to hear from me. I am finding myself feeling awful and only wanting to talk with you.**  
**Unknown 6:25 a.m. Please ignore that last message. I should not have contacted you this early about something so inane.**  
**Unknown 6:25 a.m. This is Lexa by the way, in case you think I am a stalker.**  
**Unknown 6:26 a.m. Forget everything I’ve sent please. I hope you have a good Sunday.**  
  
Lexa. Clarke’s heart jerked in her chest reading the texts, she grinned at her rambling and she eyed the clock-- 7:20 a.m. She’d been distracted and hadn’t been there for Lexa, she felt guilty but saved the contact quickly and started typing out a message as fast as she could. She wasn’t totally sure what Lexa could need but she knew she wanted to be there for it. She finally managed something after another few minutes of typing and deleting things.  
**Clarke 7:24 a.m. Lexa! I’m so sorry I didn’t reply earlier. I was working out and eating pancakes ._. Please tell me what’s wrong. I’ll listen.**  
**Clarke 7:24 a.m. Also you’d be the best stalker I could ask for. (;**  
  
The blonde laughed at her own joke, eagerly awaiting Lexa’s reply. She was so happy the girl had texted her she could barely contain a smile. She hoped whatever Lexa needed she could still tell her, Clarke felt her heart pounding fast and then her phone vibrated. She couldn’t open it fast enough.  
  
**Lexa 7:26 a.m. Don’t worry, Clarke. It’s good to work out. Pancakes are also good. I am feeling fine now. I would let you know if I were stalking you, maybe. Could be difficult.**  
  
She laughed aloud then at Lexa’s joke at herself. She couldn’t believe she’d just poked fun at herself even if harmless. She smiled but still felt her heart tug at Lexa denying to tell her what was wrong.  
  
**Clarke 7:28 a.m. Omg lol. I think I’d know, because I may be stalking you anyway. I’m so glad you think pancakes are good because we’d have to break up if you didn’t.**  
  
Clarke clicked send before she could reevaluate what she wrote, she immediately threw her phone disbelieving herself. _How could I do that?_ She grabbed it again to type out another text.  
  
**Clarke 7:28 a.m. I’m so sorry I didn’t mean anything by that I hope you’re not like freaked out. but really the pancake thing is a plus !**  
  
She bit her lip as a text came in a minute later.  
  
**Lexa 7:30 a.m. Are you implying we are something to break up? Ha. Clarke, you could not be stalking me. I may be deaf but I'm sure I’m still more aware than you. (;**  
**Lexa 7:30 a.m. And do not fret. Pancakes are *fire emoji***  
  
Clarke blushed so hard reading her messages. Lexa hadn’t used any faces or emojis till then but it was fitting and she was red in the face while smiling. She was so happy to be talking with Lexa she almost forgot to ask again what was wrong. She wanted Lexa to trust her.  
  
**Clarke 7:33 a.m. Lexa, please tell me why you felt bad this morning? And noo I don’t think we’re something to break up. Friends don’t break up so you can’t leave me c:**  
  
She hoped Lexa could look past the fact she said friends because she knew she wanted more and thought Lexa knew that too, but she just wanted to be sure she couldn’t leave her so she said it anyway. Minutes went by before her phone vibrated again. By now she’d been staring at her phone and rolling on her bed and her legs were on the wall as she opened the message.  
  
**Lexa 7:45 a.m No problem, I wouldn’t leave you Clarke. It was a moment of weakness. I feel well now and good that we are talking, but I must go to church soon with my mother.**  
**Lexa 7:45 a.m. I’m not religious myself, but if I were I would be Agnostic. You can be whatever you want. I won’t mind.**  
  
She laughed at the message and felt her heart clench as she reread the 'I wouldn’t leave you Clarke' part. Lexa had said her name now in almost every text. It made her stomach bubble happily. She didn’t want Lexa to go so she sent her a text saying she wanted to keep talking today if she did, also that she will talk to her later about that weakness crap and the brunette sent back a smile with a promise of later. With that Clarke started her day.  
  
***  
  
Lexa found herself sitting in a pew surrounded by kneeling people, the vibrations in the air of the humming were loud as their lips sung and she felt amused with the act of it all. She’d read the bible, she knew what they praised and what everyone was here to learn. Something about a man who sacrificed himself for them, for all his people and how his father is the one who condemned him. What she didn’t understand was why. Why did all of these people appreciate a god who would smite his own son? She didn’t care enough though, _if these people were happy..._ Her mother among them.  
  
Emori sat on her right, eyes glistening as she watched the Reverend sing along with the choir and she herself did too. She was never drunk during the service, she wouldn’t allow that shame but when it was over Lexa knew what awaited. She sighed. It was going to be a long sixty minutes inside these glass stained window reflected walls. There were too many statues of Jesus staring down at her and all she wanted to do was text Clarke again. They were having such a simple conversation but Lexa felt so much better just hearing from her. She could spite herself all she wanted for asking for her presence so pathetically, but Clarke didn’t laugh at her so she the least she could do was let it go so the blonde didn’t think she was broken.  
  
After way too long it felt like, people finally started to rise and Lexa too rose quickly. Her mother held her shoulder though and glared at her to stop being eager. Lexa hung her head and watched her feet move, not daring to look up until they were near their car again. As she slid into the passenger side, Emori grabbed her face with one hand and said something to her. She missed it though because Lexa’s mind was elsewhere. She wanted to be with Clarke, pretending this wasn’t her life. She ripped herself away from the tight grasp and stared out the window, hoping her mom would drop it. She did and soon enough Lexa was watching the treeline pass, the sun now bright in the sky at 9:01 a.m. Lexa couldn’t wait to check her phone but she couldn’t now without risking causing more trouble for herself. She swallowed thickly as she made a resolve to leave Clarke alone for a while for the blonde’s sake. She was much better off than Lexa was.  
  
Soon enough she arrived home and her mom yet again tried getting her attention. Lexa watched her as she spoke for what felt like minutes and she hardly caught a word. Her mom seemed distraught and was growing frantic by the second, as was Lexa’s trepidation. Her gut curled in fear and she kept holding her breath every time her mom seemed to seethe more. She waited until Emori just stared at her, hopeless. Anger and sadness dripping from her face. Finally she opened the door and just slammed it close, leaving Lexa in her wake and shaking in her seat. She knew she couldn’t go in just yet. Her mom didn’t want to see her. She looked at her phone and saw it was 9:15 a.m. and she decided to go where she knew she wouldn’t be a bother. Anya’s house.  
  
That was how she found herself sitting on Anya’s bed eating a strawberry and marmalade peanut butter jelly sandwich hours later. She told her all about her mom last night (Anya verbally assaulted Emori for a good minute when she saw her split brow) and her freak out this morning after church. Lexa felt weightless telling her because she knew Anya wouldn’t judge. The taller girl had only nodded until Lexa was done signing like a madman and mumbling her words regardless if neither of them could hear them. Lexa wanted nothing but to come clean about one final thing. Something she’d been thinking about and researching for years.  
  
‘Anya?’ She signed hesitantly. She waited to continue even after she’d nodded. About two minutes went by before Anya hit her knee expectantly. Lexa had zoned out already, but she looked to her friend very seriously then. Speaking aloud slowly and signing, "'I want to get cochlear implants I think…'” She bored her eyes into the suddenly very interesting comforter on Anya’s bed and waited for her best friend to answer her. Her gut was twisting, but her heart felt free just by saying it out loud.  
  
‘I think that’s great Lexa. If you’re sure about it, there is no reason you shouldn’t.’ Her friend replied truthfully, looking into her eyes. Lexa felt her strength and she was excited by the prospect of hearing. She could hear nature, listen to real music and hear the way people sing different words again. She herself could sing too without the worry because before all of this, she wasn’t so bad. She always hoped one day to be able to do it again. Most of all, she’d get to hear Clarke say her name in her voice which she knew must be gorgeous since it’s Clarke’s. Her spine shivered at the thought and she blushed, making Anya raise her brow. She simply laughed it off, thanking her friend and promising to text later, then she headed out quickly to spread the news.  
  
Lexa didn’t exactly want to go home to her mom, but now that she’d voice her idea of getting surgery to hear again she felt there was hope to fix their relationship. (Not that she especially wanted it, but it was for the best) As Lexa entered the house she was enveloped with the smell of banana bread in the oven and her mom standing in the kitchen. She smiled at the sight and her mom smiled back. She knew this would be a long talk, but she was welcomed well and figured if she was going to tell her mom something life changing, now was the time for it.


	6. Doubts, fears, confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while since I've updated this story and this is just a short chapter. It was much harder to get back into than I thought, but I will be continuing.  
> I've also gone back and tried to fix all the coding, hopefully the story is easier on the eyes.  
> Comments are my fuel c;  
> Hope it's good.

Clarke waited all day for a text from Lexa. Even after 9 a.m. and she knew church was over, there was nothing. A sinking feeling met the pit of her stomach, making her want to melt into her couch and never move again. Their conversation had gone over just fine, right? Then why would Lexa not talk to her even when she promised she would? Maybe she was overthinking, but she liked Lexa. A lot. Almost too much for having only known the girl officially for a few days. Even sitting on her bed, sketching away and eating pancakes all her thoughts revolved around what Lexa was doing. How she was doing. Where she could be and if she was enjoying herself doing whatever it was that kept her from texting her back. After hours and hours of finding little things to do around her house she called up Octavia, making a date for pizza.  
  
She met her friend downtown at a little joint called Polis Pizza they often frequented after school and told her about their Saturday together.  
  
“I was just sitting on the bench when I heard a gasp behind me and when I looked there was someone trying to hide behind a tree. Obviously I was nervous but I had a feeling it was ok, so I went behind it too and Lexa was right there! It was crazy how attractive she looked, O. I can’t even tell you how nice her body is; she has legs that go for miles.” Clarke drawled and blushed.  
  
“Damn Clarke you’re smitten as fuck. Are you sure you’re not already in love with the girl? Also you’re totally creepy for going behind the tree too! She was probably hiding.” Octavia teased, taking a huge messy bite from their supreme pizza. Clarke knew Lexa had been hiding, but she was so excited to see the girl again she remembers not even thinking twice about barging into her personal space. She feels a wave of shame wash over her at how she must have pushed Lexa, now that she thought about it.  
  
“Fuck. She was hiding… but I was just so excited. She even let me hold her hand and walked back to my house with me. We just sat in my fairy haven for like hours, O. I swear she had a good time…” Clarke said unsurely, doubting herself and Octavia snapped her out of it immediately.  
  
“Clarke chill out, I was kidding. I bet Lexa loved hanging out with you. Especially in the fairy haven! I can’t believe you showed that to her already. That’s like you and your dad’s spot.” She told her, making her burn red.  
  
“I know, but I wanted to share something with her and I think she really liked it. We held hands the entire time and then when she had to leave, oh my god, O. You should have seen how fucking cute and flustered she was that she was almost late. I drove her to the restaurant and she even kissed my cheek before getting out.” She admitted bashfully, taking a bite of pizza to avoid smiling too big. Octavia had a shit eating grin on her face.  
  
“God Clarke. She’s totally into you and you’re totally into her, so tell me, why aren’t you with her right now??” Clarke frowned at that.  
  
“Well, it’s weird. Even though we hung out for like 3 hours, I never asked her why she didn’t text me but then this morning she finally did! She was all upset but then took it back, asking me to forget everything she sent. Obviously I didn’t so I tried asking what was wrong but she gave me some excuse about weakness and then had to leave for church with her mom. She said she’d text me later but well, here we are. No texts and I’m eating pizza with you.” Clarke said plainly and Octavia scoffed, hitting her arm.  
  
“Jerk! I’m amazing. But yeah that’s strange. Gimme your phone.” O challenged and took it off the table before she got an answer. Clarke jumped for it to get it back but her friend was already scrolling. “Blah blah, yaddy-yada. Oh my god Clarke you threatened to break up with her over pancakes, you’re a freak.” She laughed. “She uses emoji’s?! I like her. Wow she’s funny too. I can’t believe she made a joke at herself. Anyway ok… I’ve concluded she likes you, you like her. You two are grossly flirtatious and you just need to suck it up and send her a message. Something simple, tell her you hope she had a nice day or something. Don’t bring up that she didn’t text you either.” Her friend assured her, making her nod as she spoke and agreed.  
  
“You’re right. I mean she had to go to church with her mom so that couldn’t have made for a great day. Alright, gimme, I’ll text her.” Clarke worked up the courage to do it right in front of Octavia before she chickened out again.  
  
**Clarke 7:05 p.m. Hey Lexa. I hope you had a good day today c:**  
  
It was just simple enough to make her feel like she wasn’t bothering her, but minutes went by without an answer and her anxiety grew.  
  
“God why did I text her again?! She’s probably laughing at me for being so nosy and annoying. Dammit.” Clarke huffed into her dr. pepper and heard her friend groan from where she was splayed out on the other side of the booth.  
  
“Clarke, it’s been seven minutes. Please shut up and calm down. Lexa is a nice person, there’s no way she’s laughing at you for telling her you hope she had a good day. Like who does that?” Her friend chided, making her lower her head in acknowledgement.  
  
“I know I know, I just so badly want to talk to her again. She’s all I think about Octavia… it’s really bad.” Clarke admitted.  
  
“No, it isn’t really bad. It just means you have a crush on her, maybe more than a crush and that’s okay. After Finn, you deserve to like someone again. He was a drunken fool that night and he was mean to Lexa and you. It’s been almost 6 months. Trust me when I say it’s okay.” O told her earnestly, leaning across the table and squeezing her hand in support.  
  
“Thanks, O. You’re the best. We should get out of here though before other Sky Prep kids come, yeah?”  
  
“Oh I know. Yeah, totally. I’ll see you in school tomorrow Clarkey and don’t send anymore messages until she replies!” Her friend scolded and she just nodded, knowing it was in her best interest to play hard to get rather than being too desperate. The blonde and Octavia parted ways outside the pizza place, Clarke staring at her phone the entire walk home.  
  
A few hours later around 10:00 p.m. Clarke was showered and watching That 70s Show on Netflix when her phone dinged, making her half fall off her bed as she dove across it to reach the phone. Her heart was racing because she’d set a specific ring for Lexa’s messages and knew it was her.  
  
**Lexa 10:08 p.m. Hi Clarke. Please forgive me for not responding earlier or texting after church. I hope you had a good day too.**  
  
It was vague and Clarke couldn’t help but think she was definitely holding back on her. Knowing it wasn’t her place though to push, she replied with an innocent enough message.  
  
**Clarke 10:10 p.m. That’s okayy Lexa. I did have a good day. Did you?**  
  
**Lexa 10: 13 p.m. It was eventful. I had a good talk with my mother about something important to me so it was just fine thank you. May I ask what you did?**  
  
Clarke smiled at her asking about her day, deciding to fib a little rather than admit she had wasted hours waiting to talk to her.  
  
**Clarke 10:15 p.m. My friend Octavia and I went out for pizza and I mainly just cleaned around my house this morning, after my pancake party of course c: did the talk go over well? You don’t need to tell me what it was.**  
  
**Lexa 10:16 p.m. That sounds nice, I’m glad you spent the day with a friend. Pancake parties are very important, Clarke *serious emoji* *sunglasses emoji* It is rather personal, but yes it went well, thanks.**  
  
Clarke barked a laugh at seeing Lexa use more emojis to talk about her pancake party and found herself bubbling with happiness as she typed back. She couldn’t blame her for not wanting to tell her about the personal talk, but she really wanted to know.  
  
**Clarke 10:19 p.m. Maybe you’ll feel comfortable talking to me about it eventually *blush emoji* I’m here for you for anything, okay? It was a very serious matter tho, those chocolate chips couldn’t eat themselves.**  
  
**Lexa 10:20 p.m. You are a good person for eating the chocolate chips then, I’m sure they appreciated being eaten by a fine specimen such as yourself *100 emoji* Thank you, Clarke. Maybe one day.**  
  
The blonde burned red as she laid in her bed, in the dark room lit up by the TV glow and thought about whether Lexa was still kidding or maybe if she did find her attractive. She decided to be bold and find out.  
  
**Clarke 10:22 p.m. I can’t tell if you mean that or not, but if so, thanks. It means a lot coming from someone like you.**  
  
**Lexa 10:23 p.m. Someone like me?**  
  
She bit her lip and felt her heart race. Clarke hadn’t even read over her message to see how it would sound on the other side. She hurried to explain herself.  
  
**Clarke 10:23 p.m. Someone as beautiful and kind as you, yes. I hope you don’t think I meant anything by that.**  
  
Five minutes passed, much too slowly for her liking before she got a reply.  
  
**Lexa 10:28 p.m. No, I suppose not. Thank you, Clarke. However I did mean it. I find you beautiful and kind too. I’d also add gorgeous, excited, and sweet. Whatever floats your boat, I think it *fire emoji* *blush emoji***  
  
Clarke was nearly vibrating with giddiness (really?) over Lexa’s text, re-reading it over and over until she memorized it. She took a screenshot and sent it off to Octavia, unable to help herself.  
  
**Clarke 10:30 p.m. I think you’re all those things too and more, Lexa. I’m so glad I got to meet you.**  
  
**Lexa 10:32 p.m. Thank you. I’m more glad I got to meet you. I was afraid I’d never see you again after fight night a few months ago.**  
**10:32 p.m. Sorry if that was forward ._.**  
  
The blonde laughed reading her message. In no way was it too forward. Clarke was the one who felt like she was about to burst open from happiness at just talking to the girl.  
  
**Clarke 10:34 p.m. Honestly nothing can be too forward with me (; Fight night?! God is that what you guys call that night? I like to refer to as ‘the worst and best night of my life’**  
  
**Lexa 10:36 p.m. How could a night be the worst and best??**  
  
**Clarke 10:37 p.m. It was the worst because I dumped my jerk of a boyfriend because it turns out he didn’t understand people with impairments are still people. It was also the best because I happened to run into the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen in my life. See how things work out? c:**  
  
She hoped now she wasn’t the one being too forward, but frowned as she read Lexa’s next message.  
  
**Lexa 10:40 p.m. I don’t think you realize how much it means to me how nice you are…to me, and people like me. It’s not like I’m stupid, I know people hate others who are different from them. Your boyfriend was no exception, so I appreciate you being so kind about it.**  
  
Clarke gawked at her message, unable to comprehend this gorgeous girl basically considered herself a problem and a burden to others simply for being ‘different.’  
  
**Clarke 10:42 p.m. Cough-ex boyfriend-cough. I really hope you don’t consider yourself anything less than uh, normal, though… for lack of a better word. I think you’re perfect the way you are Lexa. I’m nice to you because I want to be.**  
**Clarke 10:42 p.m. ItmayalsohelpthatIlikeyoubutheywhatever *blush emoji***  
  
She dared to send that second message, wanting the girl to really believe her. Minutes passed before a message came through.  
  
**Lexa 10:45 p.m. I do in a way because there’s no denying the obvious, I’m different because I’m deaf, but no I don’t truly consider myself anything less. OhyeahwellIguessit’sgoodIlikeyoutoobutheywhatever. Are you sleepy? I am.**  
  
**Clarke 10:47 p.m. Good, because you’re great in every way. Really? c: *blush emoji* *blush emoji* Awh you’re sleepy? You’re cuute. I’m tired too yeah.**  
  
**Lexa 10:49 p.m. Thank you Clarke. Yes, really. I find you even cuter. Let’s sleep and talk tomorrow? If you want.**  
  
**Clarke 10:50 p.m. Not possible since you’re the cutest. Okay, definitely tomorrow. Goodnight, Lexa. I hope you sleep well.**  
  
**Lexa 10:51 p.m. I hope you sleep well too. Night Clarke.**  
  
The blonde fell asleep right after putting her phone down, eager to wake again and talk to Lexa. She had school but so did Lexa at GPFD so even if she had to wait a few hours to hear from her she’d live. Hopefully.  
  
***  
  
In school the next day Lexa’s teacher was up at the board signing something about old history in the medieval times and how people were stoned to death for certain things. Being impaired in any way lead to the deaths of many. If one was not killed, they were usually tortured, exorcised for demonic possession due to their behavior, or forced to drink ice-cold water. Other treatments included having a cross shaved into their hair in order to ward off evil spirits.  
  
It all sounded completely crazy to Lexa that people didn’t understand the concept of ‘not hearing.’ It made her feel so grateful that these days so much more was known about impairments. The worst reaction she got was by bitter people who were upset she was different, there was usually no violence anymore. Violence from her mother’s anger was all she dealt with and that was only because her mom couldn’t handle her silence. It drove her crazy but nonetheless, it was not her fault and she had a plan anyway.  
  
Lexa thought about how her talk went with her mom the previous night. She’d sat Emori down while they both snacked on fresh banana bread and pulled up article after article about cochlear implants. Her mom had burst out crying as Lexa wrote to her on a word document, telling her all about how she’d been saving her own money and looking into it for years and how much she hoped she would support her. Emori gave her a big hug, which Lexa flinched from but accepted, reveling in the warmth of her mother’s embrace. It all felt like things were going to be okay, and as lunch came she felt a vibration in her phone signaling a text. She had a special phone that didn’t receive calls, lucky for her.  
  
**Clarke 12:01 p.m. I’m at lunch but I wanted to say hi. So hi Lexa (:**  
  
**Lexa 12:02 p.m. Hi Clarke. I’m at lunch too. How’s your day?**  
  
**Clarke 12:04 p.m. Good now that we’re talking c: Yours?**  
  
**Lexa 12:05 p.m. I’m learning about how people used to exorcise the deaf out of fear of demons… lol it’s great. I wanted to text you good morning but I wasn’t sure if that was weird.**  
  
**Clarke 12:07 p.m. Wow… glad we’re not in those times anymore. Ha, you and me both. I thought it’d be weird too, but it wouldn’t be, right?**  
  
**Lexa 12:08 p.m. Right. Now I wish I had, then we’d have been talking all day.**  
  
**Clarke 12:10 p.m. Same but now we are and I’m happy *blush emoji* Are you working today?**  
  
**Lexa 12:11 p.m. Nah. I only work on Tuesdays, Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays. Are you working? If you work. I don’t know if you do *blank face emoji***  
  
**Clarke 12:15 p.m. I volunteer my time to my mother’s governorship, working in her office a few times a week but that’s all. I was wondering if you’d want to hang out today then? We could sit in the fairy nook.**  
  
Lexa grinned to herself as she read Clarke’s message, taking her seat at her lunch table with some friends. She greeted her friends Costia and Anya and Monroe, who smiled back.  
  
**Lexa 12:19 p.m. That’s very cool. Your mother is a great woman, Clarke. My boss Indra really appreciated all the effort she put in on Friday to help us get the investments for another restaurant. You want to hang out again? Sure, I would love that. I liked that little nook very much.**  
  
‘Who are you texting, Lexa?’ Her friend Costia signed, making her blush red.  
  
‘A girl named Clarke.’ She responded, earning devious grins from all her friends.  
  
‘Ooh, fancy. Hearing or deaf?’ Cos asked.  
  
‘Hearing, but she is different. She’s very sweet to me.’ Lexa signed, making sure to put on her best serious face so they all really understood it was the truth. The people in the hearing community were often wrote off as ignorant, rude or just plain bad people by the deaf. Mainly because so many of the hearing were ignorant to them, but it wasn’t anyone’s fault. Lexa just wanted them to know Clarke wasn’t any of those things.  
  
‘I’m happy for you. I hope she’s sweet to you, you deserve nothing less.’ Monroe signed to her, making her smile. It was nice to be supported by people, something she wasn’t very used to having lived with her mother’s hatred for so long. All of this was the start of something new though for her and she welcomed it happily.  
  
**Clarke 12:25 p.m. You seem surprised I want to hang out again…**  
  
**Lexa 12:26 p.m. I am, Clarke. Can you blame me? It is not often the hearing bother with us.**  
  
**Clarke 12:28 p.m. Well okay yeah, but I told you I liked you and I meant that Lexa. I also told you I think you’re perfect, so, if you can look past our differences maybe we’d get to be great.**  
  
She couldn’t help but sense the slight anger in her text, unsure of what she did wrong.  
  
**Lexa 12:30 p.m. Did I say something wrong?**  
  
**Clarke 12:32 p.m. No, Lexa. I just…I just can’t stand that you think you’re so different. You can’t hear, that’s it. It’s not a big deal and I just really want you to know I think that.**  
  
She sighed as she read her message, knowing full well the blonde was just trying to make her see she didn’t care about her impairment. But that's the thing… Lexa is deaf, and so that's her life. It is a big deal to her because she’s treated badly by so many because of it. For Clarke to shut it down so simply and act like it doesn’t actually affect things made her feel small. It affected everything she did and everyone she knew. If they were going to be ‘great’ then Clarke needed to realize that.  
  
**Lexa 12:35 p.m. It is a big deal though and I need you to realize that if you’re planning on talking to me. I’m deaf, Clarke. That is probably never going to change even if I go through with cochlear surgery someday, ok? It’s a part of who I am and that makes me different. Different isn’t a bad thing. I don’t say those things because I want you to pity me, I say it so you’re aware that I’m aware. I say it so everyone who I come across is aware I am not anything less, I am just different. I can look past it, but can you? You can’t shove it aside like it’s not important, because it is, Clarke. Do you know what I mean?**  
  
Lexa typed out quickly with fervor, making her friends glance to her fast movements. ‘Just—ignore me.’ She signed and squeezed her phone in her hand, hoping Clarke would understand and not get upset she’d just spoken to her like that. She let her phone stay on the table as she rose with her friends to get food. Lexa got into the pizza line, eager to just eat something to keep down her now bubbling nerves. The lunch lady signed to her, asking what she wanted and she pointed to a big slice of pepperoni pizza.  
  
Once she was sat back down with her friends she realized she only had less than ten minutes to eat. She’d spent most of lunch texting Clarke and now she hadn’t even gotten a reply from her. Lexa’s stomach hardly settled with each bite of pizza, anxiously awaiting either a good message or a bad one. When 12:45 came and the bell-lights flashed for kids to get a move on, she accepted that she’d probably just ruined any chance she could have had with Clarke and left for her next class. Sitting in AP geometry she focused all her attention on geometric inequalities, ignoring the coincidental factor of ‘inequality’ being the reason she was feeling how she was.  
  
Lexa’s last class came to a close when the lights flashed again at 2:30 p.m. and she and her friends eagerly made their way out into the warm day of May. The skies were sunny and blue, feathery clouds high up making it look like a cartoon. She waved to Anya and Monroe who were on their way to work, leaning on the rail of the cement stairs with Costia next to her.  
  
‘So why were you grumpy all of a sudden at lunch?’ Cos signed, making Lexa grumble before replying. She was only looking at her feet, so she didn’t see the blonde girl waiting at the bottom of the stairs looking at her with expectant eyes.  
  
‘I think I messed things up with Clarke already. I always fuck things up.’ She signed lazily before pulling out her phone and half-heartedly clicking it alive before putting it back in her pocket.  
  
‘Is Clarke blonde?’ Costia signed and Lexa just laughed aloud at the randomness.  
  
‘Yes, she is blonde. Why do you ask?’ Lexa returned, finally looking to where Costia’s eyes were. Her breath caught as she saw Clarke standing there with her wavy, long hair and tight denim jeans, wearing a Beethoven shirt. She was a picture of perfection and Lexa was blushing already just looking at her, which in turn made Clarke beam.  
  
‘See you!’ Costia signed excitedly and scampered away, leaving Lexa to flounder in Clarke’s presence. Lexa slowly walked down the stairs, well aware she was trailing her eyes over every inch of Clarke before meeting her baby blues.  
  
‘Clarke? Why are you here?’ She signed carefully, hoping not to come across as still grumpy, though she was.  
  
‘I’m here because I fucked up, not you. I know you are different and I know different isn’t bad.’ The blonde signed and spoke, before continuing once more. ‘I’m so sorry I made you feel angry because of what I said. I think you’re perfect, just so perfect and it hurts me to know others don’t. That’s all.’ Pause, as the flustered blonde tried getting all her words out in time with her signing. ‘I understand you putting me in my place. Just don’t give up on me yet. Please?’ Clarke had watery eyes she could see now as she stood in front of the beautiful girl. Lexa almost couldn’t believe Clarke came all the way to her school just to apologize and ask for another chance. It felt surreal.  
  
‘Thank you. You keep surprising me, Clarke.’ Lexa signed, feeling overwhelmed by the blonde’s apology. It was the perfect thing to say and Lexa felt inadequately prepared to accept it. ‘Your chance is still very much there.’ She smiled, earning a big grin in return.  
  
"Really?" Clarke asked, forgetting to sign and Lexa giggled, nodding to her. Lexa reached for her hand and was happy Clarke eagerly took it and kissed her knuckles. ‘Do you still want to hang out today?’ Clarke signed now, letting her hand go just for a second before picking it back up as she finished.  
  
“Yeah.” Lexa said aloud, making Clarke’s eyes bulge like they did Friday night and she laughed. Clarke was blushing bright red and biting her lip to suppress what looked like the biggest smile she’d ever seen. Lexa kissed her knuckles now too and began pulling Clarke away to begin their walk. They walked in silence—duh—but she could feel Clarke’s humming vibrate through her body and she smiled to herself at how good this felt. Just as they approached Clarke’s brickhouse Lexa pulled Clarke to the side first.  
  
‘Why are you wearing a Beethoven shirt?’ She asked curiously, she’d been wanting to ask for the better part of their whole walk since she’d seen her. Clarke tilted her head though and frowned, not knowing Beethoven’s sign name. Lexa grinned and pointed to her shirt, then sighed ‘why?’ again. Clarke beat red and licked her lips before answering, which Lexa’s eyes followed.  
  
‘I got this when I started taking ASL classes. They gave them out.’ Clarke shrugged, biting her lip and Lexa again couldn’t take her eyes off the action. Clarke noticed now and did it again, nibbling both her lips and Lexa swallowed hard, nodding and moving past the girl into her yard. Clarke snagged her hand again before she walked through the gate though and pulled her back. It made her turn quickly into Clarke who pressed her lips to her cheek. It made Lexa blush and stare at the ground but Clarke just smiled and brushed past her now, pulling her into the fairy nook that was her yard.  
  
Minutes later they were laid on the swinging chair sitting together this time and Clarke turned to her, with serious eyes. Lexa furrowed her brow as she waited for the girl to say whatever she wanted to.  
  
‘You asked me a question. Now I want to ask you one.’ Clarke said and signed. Lexa nodded for her to continue but suddenly Clarke’s hand came up towards her face and Lexa gasped, flinching and pulling back hard making herself almost fall off the seat. ‘I knew it! Someone hurt you!’ Clarke signed fast and angrily as she knelt in front of her now, trying to calm her down. Lexa’s heart practically stopped when Clarke’s hand came up so abruptly, thinking she was going to hit her for some reason. Lexa just swallowed thickly and tried to regain control of her breathing. Clarke rested her hands on her knees gently and waited patiently before Lexa finally signed again.  
  
‘It’s fine, it isn’t serious. You scared me.’ She hastily told her but Clarke wasn’t buying it.  
  
‘Then what is this? How did you hurt your face and get bruised?’ Lexa felt sad knowing Clarke could see her bruise, thinking she must find it unattractive but she’d done her best to cover it up. After a few years of having to cover bruises you’d think she’d be better.  
  
‘It is nothing!’ Lexa signed fast, pulling away from Clarke’s grip. The blonde clenched her jaw and took her seat beside her again but Lexa could feel the anger pouring off her. She just hoped it wasn’t directed at her.  
  
‘Lexa. Look at me.’ Clarke signed, turning her face so she looked before even giving her the chance. ‘Whoever is hurting you… This is not okay.’ Clarke told her slowly, speaking as she did and Lexa just sighed aloud.  
  
‘It’s my life, Clarke. As I have been trying to tell you. You are better off without me if you want me to go.’ Lexa signed, hoping Clarke would say no much to her own selfishness but also knew it’d truly be best for her. Clarke’s eyes widened as she translated what Lexa said and she took both her hands, leaving her unable to communicate.  
  
“I want to be here for you. I am going to be, whether you are deaf or if you get surgery--which by the way I don't think you need... Just please, don’t shut down on me, Lexa.” Clarke said aloud and Lexa read her lips, feeling each word deeply and believing her. She just gulped, looking up at the sky for a few seconds to gather her thoughts, then looked back to blonde with an idea. Lexa nodded once, glancing to her lips then surged forward to kiss her. She felt Clarke gasp into her mouth but she quickly brought both hands up to cup her jaw, kissing her back. Before Clarke could deepen it, like Lexa felt her doing, she pulled back and couldn’t help but smile at the girl’s lazy grin and flushed face. “Wow.” Clarke said and Lexa laughed because that’s exactly what she was going to say.  
  
‘You are the best person I know, Clarke.’ Lexa signed honestly, then held Clarke’s face with one hand before pulling away again. The blonde burned red still but she leaned forward and wrapped her arms around her, embracing her in a warm hug. Lexa returned the hug and they just sat there for a few minutes holding each other on the swing. The day was warm and smelled like blooming flowers, the skies were blue and Lexa had just kissed the most beautiful girl she’d ever met. Things were going to be okay.


	7. Emori's Downfall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa thinks maybe for once her mom will accept something she does, but proves her wrong again. Clarke tries to help but sometimes the past is too much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry its been so long.  
> I hope this is alright. It's hard to get back into.

**One week and a certain question later**  
  
‘I’m excited for you to meet my mother, Clarke.’ Lexa signed to her happily and no matter how much she wanted to hold her hands she just let her talk. ‘I know I seem nervous, because I am, but this will be good.’ Then her girlfriend smiled and lead them into her house. Upon opening the door Clarke was greeted by noisy music and a woman already yelling directly at Lexa. Who of course couldn’t hear, and was just smiling at her still, while the voice became seemingly closer.  
  
“Alexandria! Who is this? Why would you bring someone home when you know I’m having a bad day from work?” The woman--her girlfriend’s mother, accused sharply while poking hard into Lexa’s chest. The girl backed up a step and shot her a small smile and urged her to go upstairs with a little push but Clarke took her hand confidently.  
  
“I’m Clarke, your daughter’s girlfriend. Why did you just put your hand on her?” She demanded to know, knowing Lexa couldn’t read her lips from this angle.  
  
“She’s my daughter as you said.” The woman replied smugly and Clarke clenched her jaw in anger. She knew now her mom was the one who hurt Lexa and it pissed her off that she would hurt her own daughter.  
  
“You’re lucky I’m--”  
  
“Lucky you’re what? A little girl? Oh Clarke. I’m so over you children.” The bite in her voice made Clarke shiver. Her heart raced knowing this was the woman who raised Lexa. How on earth could Lexa be so great with someone like this around? It made her even more proud of her girlfriend for being who she is.  
  
“I’m calling the police on you.” With that, she took Lexa back out of the house and kept on walking until they were at her own house. Feeling calm again she finally faced Lexa and her heart broke to see the unshed tears in her eyes. Suddenly she realizes she must have scared Lexa by basically dragging her out of her own house and down the street, not looking at her or talking, she just dragged her. ‘Babe it’s okay. I’m sorry.’ She signed, holding Lexa’s face after. Lexa swallowed hard before nodding.  
  
“Okay.” She said aloud and butterflies erupted at the sound of her voice, as they always do when Lexa decides to speak. She blushed at her voice and pressed a light kiss to her cheek, hoping to calm her more. Clarke lead them inside where they sat happily at her counter making sandwiches to eat. When all was said and done, (after Clarke snuck away to call the police) she sat Lexa down.  
  
‘We need to talk, ok?’ Lexa’s eyes widened just barely before she sat up straighter on the couch and put some distance between them. Clarke quickly shook her head and moved close to her again. ‘No, no. Nothing bad I swear.’ She waited for Lexa to nod before she continued. Her signing wasn’t as great as Lexa’s but she knew she didn’t need to take breaks between her words like Lexa did with her. ‘Your mom is the one who hurts you.’ Lexa went to interrupt, but Clarke cut her off with a half-hearted glare, as if daring her to deny it. ‘The second we had walked in she was yelling, Lexa, asking you who I was and just being a--’ she paused trying to think of it, but couldn’t. “Bitch.” She spoke aloud, watching Lexa’s lips curl just a little. ‘Yeah, she’s that, and then she poked you so hard. Does she even know you’re deaf?! She talks right at you without slowing down or signing. Can she sign at all? Like I can’t believe you put up with this. Anyway I need to tell you… I called the police.’  
  
At the word police, Lexa jumped off the couch and yelled. “What?! You did what?!” Clarke would’ve swooned over her voice but she knew instead she had just done something really wrong in Lexa’s eyes.  
  
“Lexa! Please!” Then she signed in haste. ‘I had to! Your mother hurts you and bruises you. She hates you Lexa! Don’t be mad at me for trying to save you. Please.’ Clarke begged, watching the anger grow in her girlfriend’s green eyes.  
  
“Fuck you!” Lexa spit exasperatedly and thus breaking her heart with those two words, all the while storming out of her house. Clarke was left hollow and feeling empty as she sat on the couch. She knew better than to chase Lexa now, the girl needed some time. Guilt ate her away for telling Lexa her own mother hated her, but it was the truth and she needed to know. No mother says, ‘I’m so over you children’ unless she hates ...well, it seems like everything. The blonde just hoped more than anything their relationship was enough for Lexa to come back to when she got home and faced the truth. She really hoped… because she knew she loved that girl.  
  
***  
  
Lexa pounded her way down the street, sure her feet were louder than necessary as they scraped their way home. She couldn’t believe Clarke just told her her mother hates her. She didn’t fucking need _Clarke_ to tell her that. How could she not know? Emori beats her and yells and screams, all the while knowing Lexa can’t help her, she can’t even hear her, she can’t do anything. How could Clarke be so stupid to call the police though? Now her mother would be locked away probably. Her heart sunk at the thought.  
  
Sure Emori wasn’t her favorite person, but this was her mother. The woman who taught her to walk, taught her to talk and sing. Emori taught Lexa to eat only the right berries off strange bushes, to avoid people asking for help with a lost dog, everything. She taught Lexa how to love. When Lexa went deaf, Emori even taught her how to hate. Emori taught her how to live. It didn’t matter what happened between them, because it was exactly that, between them. Now Clarke had ruined it. She couldn’t hear the sirens, but she saw the flashing red and blues outside her house as she came near. Her mother was in the front yard, arms flailing and spit flying. There were two police cruisers and an ambulance out front and her heart sinks in fear.  
  
“Alexandria!” Her mother yells out, she reads it on her lips like her mother is yelling for her to help her. And she does. Lexa breaks into a sprint and squeezes herself between the police approaching her frantic mother. She begins signing to them madly, hoping they’ll understand.  
  
‘Please please, stop! You don’t know us! My mom and I are fine.’ The brunette repeated over and over, but the officers stared at like her she had three heads. Finally a paramedic came to her, shushing her by taking her hands and half dragging her away. She squirmed in protest, disbelieving that this EMT was man-handling her and pulling her away from her own mother. They weren’t listening to her! “STOP! Back the fuck off!” Lexa screamed finally, feeling her voice hoarse in her throat come out like a bark. The man let go of her with wide eyes, as if he didn’t know she could even speak.  
  
How dare these people treat her like she wasn’t a person? God damn people. She shoved him away, retreating back to Emori who was wide eyed too but had a gentle smile on her lips and reaching hands. Lexa gingerly stepped into her mom’s arms, only being hesitant by instinct before she hugged her hard.  
  
“My girl. My lovely girl.” Lexa felt her mom mumble words into her hair, unknowing what they were but this embrace was the closest she’s had in awhile with her mother. “See? You dumb officers don’t know anything. You get a call from a little girl and come running. Like the boy who cried wolf. Children are so manipulative.” Lexa felt her mom’s breath hitting her as she spoke and the scent of liquor was suddenly overpowering as she took notice of the state Emori was in. The woman’s eyes were beat red, blood-shot and had bags underneath. She had on her loose, drinking tee that was stained with so much alcohol it reeked and Emori was gripping Lexa in the hug like she’d fall over otherwise. The brunette let her mom go, taking a second to look her in the eye as she gave her little speech but Emori’s arms pulled her back in, hard and painful to her chest. Slowly she realized she couldn’t breathe and started trying to pull away.  
  
“Ma’am, let her go. Before anyone gets hurt.” The officers coming up to them faster, one pointing a taser at the woman.  
  
“Don’t you get it? My daughter left me! My Alexandria hasn’t spoken to me in years because she got sick. I let her get sick. I’m a shitty mom, aren’t I? Now I hate children because my child left me. My poor girl.” Lexa was becoming faint now and started fighting against Emori’s hold on her, but then her mom twisted her around her front and put her hands to her throat squeezing with all her strength.  
  
Lexa’s eyes bulged as she fell to her knees, pulling at her mom’s hands to release her. She was seconds from losing consciousness but then the officers lurched into action one tackling Emori right over her, knocking Lexa to the ground in his wake while the other pulled her away quickly handing her off to the EMT and helping subdue her once more.  
  
“Are you ok? Can you breathe alright?” The man asked in vain as she struggled to catch her breath and simply went on prodding her anyway with his stethoscope and what have you. She was fuming mad, but fuck, was she heartbroken too. I must be a fool Lexa thought angrily. How could she have believed her mother was ever on her side? Emori was only ever on her own side. Still she wishes she’d been able to hear the spiel her mom just gave, knowing it would have given her enough fuel for closure if she’d heard the mean words she surely spit.  
  
Lexa caught her breath finally, watching in a blurry daze as her mother was forced upright and handcuffed then put into the police car. Actually, everything after that was a blur. She found herself sitting in the police station for some time before a translator could come down and finally, sat in a small white room Lexa told them all about what Emori’s done since she was 10. Her spiral of anger, drinking, the violence. By the end of it, she was sure she sealed her mom’s fate. It didn’t numb the hurt though. The bruises around her throat or her broken heart over being hurt and betrayed, again, by the woman who was supposed to love her.  
  
Clarke was right. Her beautiful, caring girlfriend had been right, and she knew that.. The brunette was in the wrong to be so horrible to her and even if she apologized, it must be too late. Who forgives someone when they say, ‘fuck you’? Those awful words entail so much hate and venom behind them, when Clarke had nothing but love behind hers. A feeling of dread overcame her, but still she sat until it was dark and the ringing phones in the police station had become nothing but background noise. Lexa had to wait for someone to come get her and take her in, but who?  
  
Emori was estranged with her parents, therefor leaving Lexa with no option to contact her only relatives. Without much thought, she decided to call Indra. As she begged and pleaded on the phone for her to understand the situation, Indra agreed to take her in. Emori and Indra did not get along from the start. When Lexa began working at Deaf Encounters she had to disclose all her personal issues with the woman because having an alcoholic, abusive mother meant Lexa would show up with bruises randomly or maybe not at all. Indra could see she was a good kid though and gave her the chance. Now Lexa just hoped this wouldn’t be her last one.  
  
Just after 11 p.m. came, Indra came through the station doors. She had to close up the restaurant and Lexa understood. Besides, she didn’t mind the waiting. It was mind numbing. Something she desperately needed and still needs after her day. Indra doesn’t say much except hug her and tell her she’s better off before leading her back to the car. When they pull up to DE again and climb the stairs to Indra’s home above it, the exhaustion hits her. Just before she crashes into the soft, plush couch, she pulls out her phone to send a quick text.  
  
**Lexa 11:33 p.m. You were right, but I need time.**  
  
She turned it off after, putting it away in the drawer for god knows how long. All Lexa wanted to focus on for awhile was school, work and maybe, just maybe it was time for that surgery. After falling asleep soon after, Clarke’s reply goes unseen as she dreams of the future.  
  
**Clarke 11:40 p.m. I’ll wait for you.**


	8. 50 Days

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa needed time. How much time?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to say now, I gave Lexa the surgery for HERSELF. She made the choice to hear after all her pain.
> 
> Enjoy perhaps.
> 
> This may or may not be the last chapter.

**-50 Days Later-**  
  
Clarke has woken up with a heavy heart and a heavier conscience every single day for _fifty fucking days._ An absurd amount of time to her. She hadn’t heard from Lexa or seen her. Her heart broke the day Lexa said she needed time, because how much time does she need? Clarke can’t take it anymore. It just felt like it was over… The blonde had been throwing herself into school, she went from B’s to straight A’s and she worked everyday in her mother’s office until well past sundown. It was wearing her thin, literally and mentally. Clarke had lost weight and lost her happiness too.  
  
As much as she wanted to blame Lexa she knew it was neither of their faults in the end. Lexa had to figure herself out after what Emori did. The story came out after her arrest in the local paper. Lexa had gone deaf at age 10 after contracting a sickness and Emori turned into a drunk, thus becoming abusive as well. The article mainly focused on abusive situations and what to do if you’re in one after that, but Clarke felt horrible to learn Lexa had been being hurt for years. She wanted to reach out to her ..girlfriend? So badly.  
  
Clarke isn’t sure if they’re even still dating, but she’s been faithful anyway because she’s in love with Lexa. She knows she is. The day Lexa kissed her in her backyard while they sat under the sun in her fairy nook was when she fell. Feeling the softness of her lips pressed against her own was the best feeling she’d ever had, besides everything Lexa makes her feel otherwise of course. The blonde lays in bed a while longer, allowing herself a moment of weakness to dwell and cry over the situation. Once she pitied herself enough Clarke got up, ready to tackle the day at work.  
  
The blonde was on her way home after a long day at the office working under her mother’s scrutinizing eyes. Exhaustion ran through her as she took a seat on a bench at Polis Park, taking a minute to breathe in the June night air. The sound of croaking bullfrogs and children laughing nearby make her smile softly at the sky, her thoughts clearing for a little while. Clarke didn’t know how long she stayed sitting, but a cold gust reminded her that even summer nights can be chilly. She began walking out of the park through the archway when a familiar looking brunette flashed in her peripheral.  
  
Her head jerked to the side, doing a double take as Lexa walked in the opposite direction under the moonlight. She couldn’t even gather her thoughts before she took off after her.  
  
“Lexa! Lex!” Clarke called expecting no reply, but suddenly Lexa stopped and turned. A huge smile played on her lips as she turned but Clarke stopped in her tracks now too, disbelieving of what was happening. _Did she hear me?_ She thinks feverishly. Lexa answers for her though.  
  
“Hey, Clarke.” The sound of her voice sounding so casual and confident throws her off even harder. Clarke frowns and backs up a step, her heart racing. Was this even Lexa? Lexa frowned a little too as she approached slowly, her hands out as if Clarke was a scared animal. “I know it’s crazy but yes, I can hear you. I had the cochlear implant surgery a month ago. Clarke… I’m sorry for taking so long.” The blonde was just stunned, for lack of a better word. She was shaking and her breaths were loud, but Lexa was talking to her. It was the most she’d ever said and she’d be lying if she said her voice didn’t sound like silk in her ears.  
  
“I--fuck.” Clarke cried out, grabbing Lexa’s hands and hugging her so tightly her heart felt like it was bursting. “I missed you.” She sobbed into her shoulder after a minute of silence. “I missed you so much.” Lexa held her just as tightly and mumbled sweet words to her too.  
  
“I missed you too Clarke. I love you--” Clarke jerked away at that, a smile on her lips at her words. Lexa’s green eyes were staring at her blue and she knew she meant it. Clarke knew she’d been waiting to say it too by the excitement in her tone and love she could hear. Her heart thudded in her chest, finally feeling alive.  
  
“I love you too. So fucking much.” She promised her, pulling her face in for a hard, needy kiss. Lexa smiled big at her when she pulled away and giggled, the sound making Clarke’s heart soar.  
  
“I missed that the most though.” The brunette grinned and Clarke couldn’t even disagree with her as she just pulled her into another heated kiss. She knew they’d have to talk this over later, the whole Lexa getting that damn surgery (as happy as she was that Lexa would speak aloud now and what not, she didn’t _need_ it) and then she’d have to ask if they were even dating. As for now though, Clarke finally had Lexa back in her arms and she wasn’t letting go again.  
  
***  
  
The brunette was being lead by her lovely girlfriend Clarke down a crowded street on this Saturday night. It was now mid July and the air was thick with humidity and fireworks. Aspen Hill was bursting at the seams with tourists but still Clarke pushed on dragging her. She managed to convince Lexa to meet all her friends again, the ex boyfriend included, and Lexa was dreading it. Obviously she couldn’t not know Clarke’s friends, but it pissed her off that they’re the same group who were drunk and treated her awfully for being deaf. However the blonde promised everyone was excited (and apologetic) about the second meeting.  
  
Clarke squeezes her hand and stops them outside so Lexa turns to her and can’t help but blush at the sight she’s met with. Her girlfriend is dressed in a tight black dress that fits her perfectly, short black boots and her long blonde hair is twisted into Lexa’s best braids. The look Clarke is giving her makes her shiver, but she holds strong anyway. She herself is dressed in black joggers with a flowing white crop top over it and her hair is in a messy ponytail. Clarke’s blue eyes travel down her face to her neck and she grins and turns from Clarke ruining the view, or so she thought.  
  
“Lexa.” Clarke husks and a chill runs down her spine, like it does every time Clarke said her name. She remembers the first time she heard Clarke’s voice in the park that night had made her lose her breath. Lexa had never expected her voice to be so husky and deeper than her own, which she’d forgotten was actually rather girly. It made her laugh to think about the two of them, but she loved their dynamic. Clarke was shorter than she, yet Clarke was the one who was more outgoing and seemed to ‘wear the pants’ if you will. Her idea of a party was drinks, lights, music, people and more drinks. Lexa’s kind of ‘party’ usually involves her going into the woods and getting lost following the stars.  
  
“Clarke.” She smiled, stepping into Clarke’s space and wrapping her arms around the girl’s hips. Clarke stepped closer too, hooking her arms on Lexa’s neck and pressing a kiss to her lips.  
  
“I’m so glad you want to meet my friends. It’ll be great and Finn won’t be a problem, he uh-found himself a boyfriend.” Clarke giggled. Lexa’s brows rose momentarily before she smiled.  
  
“Really? Wow cool. I’m glad. Let’s go in then.” She said, stealing one last kiss and stepping away to reach for the door. “After you my love.” Clarke’s cheeks got a tint of pink as she walked through, Lexa following. After a minute they approached a table that sat the friends Lexa recognized from fight night. The dark haired girl who looked like the boy with dark hair, the one who hit Gustus, she learned was Octavia and her brother Bellamy. Clarke has been friends with them since middle school when the twins stuck up for her. Finn sat next to Octavia and another gruff looking boy sat next to him. Octavia’s boyfriend Lincoln was also there, and the first to stand and speak.  
  
“Hello, I’m Lincoln. I um-I want to say sorry for our first meeting. Or lack of. I know we were all being dicks and attacked your bouncer and I’m real sorry for that night-”  
  
“Linc! It’s okay. Lexa doesn’t care anymore.” Clarke interrupted the tall, muscled guy’s rambling and he sat back down with a light blush. “Right babe?” Lexa intertwined her fingers into Clarke’s, pulling her into the booth next to her.  
  
“It’s okay, really. I understand being drunk can change a person.” She said lightly, not intending much but Clarke still gave her hand a squeeze. “Have you guys ordered?” The brunette asked in order to change the subject, throwing Clarke a soft smile.  
  
“Hey wait, before we order-- Lexa, I’m Finn. I’m the one who really needs to apologize to you for my behavior.” She was surprised at Finn’s interruption, but she was happy nonetheless as the boy spoke and introduced his boyfriend. “This is John, but we just call him Murphy. Him and I have been dating a few weeks now.” Lexa smiled to the punky boy, who nodded before sending a surreptitious and cute glance to Finn who returned the look. “Now, are we ready?”  
  
The night went really, really well after that. Lexa loved Clarke’s friends. It didn’t matter to her that they were the same group who had insulted her so long ago. People change. She’s changed too. Being able to hear again has brought back so many traits to her. Lexa sings again, and she makes jokes aloud with Clarke. When September comes she’ll still attend GPFD but only because that’s where her friends go. Otherwise she’s been spending most of her days usually surrounded by Clarke and her gang, who have become good friends of her’s too.  
  
Indra has let Lexa officially move in with her, due to Emori being in jail now. A thought that pains Lexa’s heart but she knows still it’s for the best. It hadn’t dawned on her just how bad Emori had been to her. Sure, her first ten years were spent being cared for perfectly, but after she’d gone deaf Emori had essentially treated her like less than human. In the end it was Emori who was less than human. Thankfully Indra was the perfect, yet stoic like herself, companion to live with and work for. Deaf Encounters had received investments of almost half a million dollars so the coming of Fall also brought with it a brand new restaurant.  
  
There is a managing job waiting for her as soon as the building is built and she can’t wait. Clarke wants to work there too, as a cook though because surprisingly (she found out the good way) her girlfriend is an amazing chef. The night Clarke prepared for her a few weeks after reconciling had been one she wouldn’t ever forget. It was the most romantic night they’ve had between the two of them. Every little thing she discovered about Clarke made her fall harder and she couldn’t be more grateful to her life for how it’s changed. It’s all happened rather quickly, but she doesn’t regret anything and now, with Clarke by her side and the future in store, she’s ready to take on anything.  
  
She and Clarke are sat in their spot in the fairy haven, watching the moon disappear and reappear through the clouds. Crickets chirp happily in the long grass and Clarke’s husky voice is humming a tune that makes Lexa’s heart feel light. The brunette takes a glance at her beautiful girlfriend next to her, sucking in a much needed breath at the sight she’s met with. Clarke’s long blonde hair, which has grown longer and brighter in the summer sun, falls over her shoulder as she looks at the sky. Her pale skin glows in the moonlight and Lexa can’t help but stare. Her heart stills and starts over and over as she comes to terms with how much this girl next to her means to her. Lexa gives her hand a squeeze to remind Clarke she’s there. Blue eyes meet her own green with a sleepy smile.  
  
“What’s up babe?” Clarke muses, looking to her lips and back to her eyes. Lexa’s heart skips another beat at her soft tone and she knows exactly what to say as she moves closer to the blonde.  
  
“You’re my favorite person. I’ve never met someone like you, and I want you to know that. You’ve saved me in many ways and I... love you, Clarke.” A gasp leaves her girlfriend’s lips before suddenly she’s kissing Lexa so hard they fall over in the chair she’s in. Clarke doesn’t stop kissing her until they’re both well out of breath and their pupils are blown. Lexa looks up at Clarke who’s straddling her under the moonlight and yep, I love her.  
  
“I love you too Lexa. I always will.” With that, more kisses ensued before Clarke took her by the hand and pulled her inside, eager to show her just how much.


End file.
